Zack & Nick's Culture Cast

Digesting the lowest rung of pop culture so you don't have to!

Review: Stitches (’12)

“I want more stitches!” – The Gorehound.

This movie is fantastic. Streaming on Netflix as of 4/21/2014 comes a movie, 2 years past, about some clown on a rampage. There’s little demand for clown-horror and nothing has ever topped It (’90) and likely nothing ever will but that’s not to say there isn’t any clown-horror. It’s surprising because many people maintain a strong fear of clowns and logically, shouldn’t there be many fearful horror movie s then? Perhaps a future analysis of clown-lacking horror movies is in pursuit…


Stitches is very entertaining and hits all the crucial horror elements. To add more credibility, the Gorehound’s graveyard queen says that this movie was “disgusting”. That adds like 25 points of awesome because she was still able to stick through it. When moviegoers get excited for the final battle or the fight scene, the Gorehound gets going when the blood splatters. The gore flows through this one. On par with early Peter Jackson.

PHCEBEbBlYpFGG_1_mOne aspect that really sets this film aside from other films is some slow motion sequences. Most often when the Gorehound comes home from a long day and just wants something entertaining to watch, he searches for some horror flick where 5 teens must escape some killer something. There is in incredible amount of movies with this same exact plotline but it’s very entertaining and relaxing. Similar to TV episodes where you have recurring characters and similar dilemmas, so do many horror movies follow this trend… and sometimes, these generic films offer something beautiful that makes you want to tell all your friends. Well this is one of those. Go watch this film. It’s different in very good ways.

Let’s delve into the plot… some kids accidentally kill a clown at their like their 6th or 7th birthday party. It was an accident and the kid is terribly distraught. Upon the clowns dying (and inability to finish the show he initially started), he is cursed and must eventually finish his show 6 years later (or when he is 17 years old or so). Upon this birthday party, the show is finally coming to an end. The clown comes back from the dead and tries to finish off the originally birthday party.

Gemma-Leah Devereux (Kate), Tommy Knight (Tom), and Shane Murray-Corcoran (Vinny). The primary troupe.

Gemma-Leah Devereux (Kate), Tommy Knight (Tom), and Shane Murray-Corcoran (Vinny). The primary troupe.

This film is great due to the following reasons: solid acting, story, unique kills, fun characters, and potential for a future enterprise. It still has the undefinable quality which makes all entertaining movies entertaining. I want more stitches. This clown (Ross Noble) is a 20th century killer that isn’t from some low-budget movie or Full Moon Pictures. I hope to see this guy in sequels to come and fill the ranks of Jason, Angela, and Freddy. 5/5

P.S. For additional clown-related horror movies, the Gorehound highly recommends Full Moon Picture’s Killjoy series.


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